Dinar Gurus predict earthquakes: a little humour for a Thursday morning

A friend sent this to me last night. I read it. I snickered.  I read it again this morning, and I snickered again.  So, as there is nothing else going on this morning I thought I'd share the giggle with any of my readers who have spent months and years reading Dinar updates from the "gurus"




The Dinar RV is sort of like an earthquake along the San Andreas Fault in California.  We know it's
coming, we don't know when, and we don't know how big.

So if the guru's were all earthquake experts, how would they be reporting this to us?

Let's take a look:

Intel Guru Bluwolf:  Would be standing right on the fault screaming "Any Second Now," but nobody would be paying attention to him any more.

Intel Guru Footforward:  "The earthquake should have already happened."

Intel Guru Checkmate:  Would be talking incessantly about why we need to get our earthquake preparation kits in order and why all the other earthquake guru's are wrong

Intel Guru TonyTNT:  "It's a great day for an earthquake."

Intel Guru Gary:  "Dr Todd is still scratching his head wondering why this earthquake hasn't happened yet."

Newshound Guru Adam Montana:  Believes that the earthquake will start small, and
then there will be multiple earthquakes getting bigger over time.

Intel Guru Okie:  He has been told that the U.S. Geological Survey is giving
him exclusive rights to announce the earthquake to the entire world.

Intel Guru Jonnywg:  Keeps staring at the seismonitor screens waiting for the
earthquake to register.

Intel Guru Soonerfan62:  Tells us once again that we will not have to go
through another weekend without an earthquake.

Newshound Guru BGG:  Believes that Maliki is somehow stopping the earthquake and
until he is removed from the San Andreas Fault, it' won't happen.

Intel Guru Poppy3:  "The corrupt politicians have figured out a way to stop
this earthquake, and they have to be removed."

Newshound Guru SWFlorida Guru:  Would produce endless research articles detailing exactly
why the earthquake has to happen, but still wonders if this is all true.

Intel Guru Bulldog75:  Would be sitting in a Starbucks near the San Andreas Fault talking aimlessly about geological events that might be happening soon, but nobody can understand what he's really trying to
say.

Intel Guru Hammermann:  "Y'all know that I'm the smartest earthquake predictor
in the entire world, and I have it on great authority that the earthquake will start in Reno."

Intel Guru Blaino:  Will sound like Billy Mays as he does infomercials selling
his brand of earthquake prediction instruments to the public.

Guru Ali:  Says the earthquake won't be happening for years and years
down the road while he still eagerly sells earthquake insurance to
the masses.